An Englishman in New England

An Englishman in New England

Work like no-one's watching, dance like you don't need the money, and hurt like you've never been loved.

All About The Englishman


Be informed
Be entertained
Be perverted
Confess, sinner
Things fall apart. The center cannot hold.
Change your perceptions. They're lame.
I have a dream.
I am Jack's imaginary friend
Don't think. Just Grow.
For all your multimedia needs
Rehabilitating Mr. Wiggles
Filthy Lies
Hey! You make me throw up a little!
The Framley Examiner Personals
From the creator of 'Grow'
Fura Neko games!
This man is everything I hope to be, artistically
Tokyo Plastic 2.0h!

I love free speech. Talk to me.


December 2003
January 2004
February 2004
March 2004
April 2004
May 2004
June 2004
July 2004
August 2004
December 2004
March 2005


Belle De Jour
C h a p e l . P e r i l o u s
Another Girl, Another Planet
Robber Rabbit

currently. . .

[Playing] Oh, holy Halo 2, Xbox
[Reading] War of the Worlds
[Songs of the Moment] Freelove Freeway, Ricky Gervais/David Brent & Noel Gallagher (The Office), Let Me Love You, Mario
[Movie(s) of the Moment] Before Sunset

highlight reel

Pussy Perspectives
The Laid List
Liquored Up and Lookin' Fer Pussy
Orphan Rampage
The Office and David Carradine
Urkel's Calling
A Wee Turtle's Head
Non-Event Horizon
The Illusion of Time
Born To Run
Bush Humor
Fiendster: The Anti-Friendster
Crusoe and the INS
Peak Oil
Smile for me, Mona
Spin the bullet bachelor party
Spin the bullet part II
Heaven and Home
Heal the world

Atom Feed me, Seymour

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Thursday, February 26

Get away, you filthy urchin, lest my cane find your crap-smeared buttocks!

Part 2: Things I Don't Miss About England

- "What football team d'you support" - [insert instant stereotype of you here]
- "Did you watch the game last night?" - yes = see # 1, no = "Wot, are you a poof or summink?"
- The tabloids - why won't they stop hounding me?
- The teeth. Specifically, my teeth.
- My school cliques (yes, we had the whole "Popular slut dates sports team captain" thing too)
- Tim Henman - Average player + wanker + hot wife = unlimited domestic press coverage as "Britain's Great White Hope"
- 1 pound coins - fuckers are heavy!
- British Telecom's constant shuffling of the telephone area codes. Am I in the 0181 or 0171 area? What do you mean it's now 01207?
- The class system.
- Posh and Becks
- Weekly royal scandals
- Restraining my big fucking mouth