An Englishman in New England

An Englishman in New England

Work like no-one's watching, dance like you don't need the money, and hurt like you've never been loved.

All About The Englishman


Be informed
Be entertained
Be perverted
Confess, sinner
Things fall apart. The center cannot hold.
Change your perceptions. They're lame.
I have a dream.
I am Jack's imaginary friend
Don't think. Just Grow.
For all your multimedia needs
Rehabilitating Mr. Wiggles
Filthy Lies
Hey! You make me throw up a little!
The Framley Examiner Personals
From the creator of 'Grow'
Fura Neko games!
This man is everything I hope to be, artistically
Tokyo Plastic 2.0h!

I love free speech. Talk to me.


December 2003
January 2004
February 2004
March 2004
April 2004
May 2004
June 2004
July 2004
August 2004
December 2004
March 2005


Belle De Jour
C h a p e l . P e r i l o u s
Another Girl, Another Planet
Robber Rabbit

currently. . .

[Playing] Oh, holy Halo 2, Xbox
[Reading] War of the Worlds
[Songs of the Moment] Freelove Freeway, Ricky Gervais/David Brent & Noel Gallagher (The Office), Let Me Love You, Mario
[Movie(s) of the Moment] Before Sunset

highlight reel

Pussy Perspectives
The Laid List
Liquored Up and Lookin' Fer Pussy
Orphan Rampage
The Office and David Carradine
Urkel's Calling
A Wee Turtle's Head
Non-Event Horizon
The Illusion of Time
Born To Run
Bush Humor
Fiendster: The Anti-Friendster
Crusoe and the INS
Peak Oil
Smile for me, Mona
Spin the bullet bachelor party
Spin the bullet part II
Heaven and Home
Heal the world

Atom Feed me, Seymour

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Wednesday, March 17

The Running Man is not fiction - it was a prediction

Can you hear me down there? I know, this high horse is very tall isn't it? Well I can explain. They lulled me, you see. I thought reality TV couldn't shock me any more. I was wrong.

The Swan is coming.

'Ugly' women will undergo drastic plastic surgery while the slavering millions watch in sweaty anticipation - with each round of healing, they will be voted (or should I say cast) off, unfit for the judge's tastes, until the most brutally butchered but dramatically recovered woman is left to be crowned as - you guessed it - The Swan.

"I'm sorry Judy, even with the best plastic surgery money can buy, I think you're as ugly as Satan's turdhole - you should go home now and get back to washing dishes in the basement where noone's vision can ever be infected with the disease you call your face. Bye bye!"

How can these women put themselves through this? How can ethics and standards be dragged so low?

Can you imagine the kinds of things that are said in the boardrooms of Fox?

"So my new idea, it's this edgy new take on this reality thing that seems so cool - how about we take an ordinary member of the public, some schmoe, y'know, then have him wait around a corner, and then - get this - then, we pay him to kill a man!"

"Genius, Brent, you're gonna make VP of broadcasting with this one!"

You may feel free to retch with disgust at this show, the TV execs, society as a whole. I did. I'm coming down now - could you hold the ladder steady for me? The wind up here keeps making it sway most worryingly. . .