An Englishman in New England

An Englishman in New England

Work like no-one's watching, dance like you don't need the money, and hurt like you've never been loved.

All About The Englishman


Be informed
Be entertained
Be perverted
Confess, sinner
Things fall apart. The center cannot hold.
Change your perceptions. They're lame.
I have a dream.
I am Jack's imaginary friend
Don't think. Just Grow.
For all your multimedia needs
Rehabilitating Mr. Wiggles
Filthy Lies
Hey! You make me throw up a little!
The Framley Examiner Personals
From the creator of 'Grow'
Fura Neko games!
This man is everything I hope to be, artistically
Tokyo Plastic 2.0h!

I love free speech. Talk to me.


December 2003
January 2004
February 2004
March 2004
April 2004
May 2004
June 2004
July 2004
August 2004
December 2004
March 2005


Belle De Jour
C h a p e l . P e r i l o u s
Another Girl, Another Planet
Robber Rabbit

currently. . .

[Playing] Oh, holy Halo 2, Xbox
[Reading] War of the Worlds
[Songs of the Moment] Freelove Freeway, Ricky Gervais/David Brent & Noel Gallagher (The Office), Let Me Love You, Mario
[Movie(s) of the Moment] Before Sunset

highlight reel

Pussy Perspectives
The Laid List
Liquored Up and Lookin' Fer Pussy
Orphan Rampage
The Office and David Carradine
Urkel's Calling
A Wee Turtle's Head
Non-Event Horizon
The Illusion of Time
Born To Run
Bush Humor
Fiendster: The Anti-Friendster
Crusoe and the INS
Peak Oil
Smile for me, Mona
Spin the bullet bachelor party
Spin the bullet part II
Heaven and Home
Heal the world

Atom Feed me, Seymour

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Tuesday, April 20

Marathon Man

As the exhausted runners dragged their chapped asses across the finish line here in the 87 degree heat, I couldn't help but ruminate on the similarities of their physical trial to my mental one, which coincidentally started yesterday. No, my brain has never had diarrhoea on the go, nor have I ever had to put intellectual vaseline on my mental nipples. This is something different.

Officially, I've been out of work since yesterday, you see, but I'm neither incompetent, obsolete, nor lazy. Of the 'Willing and Able to Work' category, I lack the 'Able' part. Thanks to an abrupt law-change at the INS, I now exist in the shadow land between visa statuses. Regular readers will already know how my dealings with this particular branch of government typically proceed. The upshot of these shenanigans means that my ability to work has been amputated, yet I am allowed to stay while I wait for them to reattach it.

It's a very strange thing to be barred from being useful - especially when the verbiage that dictates such an unorthodox situation is contained in the Fair Labor Act, a document which I feel justified in thinking is not quite all it's cracked up to be.

Legally, I'm not allowed to even set foot in my employer's office building, so I sit here at home, and engage myself with such varied arty-crafty activities that Martha would be hissing with jealousy from her cage.

This is my marathon, and I'm in it for the long haul.